Has anyone tried ecigarettes? I’d absolutely HATE to rekindle my terrible smoking habit, and I haven’t, but I’m reaching for all the food in the world to subsidize. Thoughts?
I just made a Monday cocktail because fuck bitches get money, etc, and so forth. I’m kidding, I made a cocktail to celebrate the THIRTY days I have left until I’m sitting on NONIE’S couch, drinking a cocktail, and saying fuck bitches get money (and by that I mean watching Jeopardy with my grandmother while she feeds me everything because I’m fat yet look...
I’ve put on giant hot pink sweatpants, sprayed Febreeze on my person as if it were body spray, threw the humidity wretched mess I call hair on top of my head, and I’m throwing back a glass of wine waiting for my friends to get here. And I just realized taking one cold, hard look at myself in my giant purple slippers and tank that you can see my floral brassier through, that if I was...
You know what’s sad about reading books? It’s that you fall in love with the...– Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (via thatsnightlockdumbshit)
“My inner goddess just peed her pants. She needs depends”- My mother has been reading 50 Shades of Grey
Trying to plan a trip home for one weekend and realizing you’ve really put one hell of a dent in your savings being unemployed for almost a year…..opposite of priceless. Very, very pricey. If you will.
I had three bites of cold leftover pizza, two...
I’m an adult. Motherfuckers.
I sort of feel like I need something awesome to...
And I need it to happen soon.
I'm going to sleep
But I am missing you people so hard right now. Let us use what our forefathers used to communicate. Email. I can be found at Kelly.Loeser@gmail.com and I want a hello and update on ALL of you. The end.
What's been going on? What's been going on:
HELLO WORLD I HAVE MISSED YOU. GRAB A BEER. WELCOME TO THE UPDATE Work is EXCELLENT, except, I have no time for anything aside from sleep, sometimes feeding myself, and gossiping with my coworkers I….I haven’t been drinking? That’s a lie. I haven’t been drinking on WEEKNIGHTS. I made you nervous, didn’t I? I’m sorry. Lilly is still alive! And comes with...
Is thing on??
Ahem. WHATS GOING ON INTERNEEEEEEEEEEET????!!!??
Dear Tampa Friends
Or any other friends, really. We’re having a Gasparilla Party so if you want to come and say wassup or just have some pirate brews with us gimme a shout out and I’ll give you my address and we’ll do this damn thing, ok?
UGH YOU GUYS! Sorry about the effin spam. Why do I always get fucking hacked what’s up with that shit?
There is a Jersey Shore Marathon on right now
And it is not the same with out my bitches either being pre drunk, drunk, or super hungover with me. I miss you ladies :(
Going to get a new licence today. Hopefully they...
sasstacular replied to your photo: LOES WHY YOU SO FUNNY ALL OF THE TIMEZ FUNNY LOOKING BAHAHAHAHAH omg i am so fucking sad I don’t get to see you this weekend. Seriously. :( HATE EVERYTHANG I mean not you, but the stuff that keeps you away :(
clarityunfiltered: bowlingalley-lawyer: mikes-nosenses: I don’t care if it’s hipster, this is beautiful. What are you doing New Year’s Eve? How cute is this? HATE ON ME, but Joseph Gorden Whatshisface is the supreme man of my life. Step aside, Loes, there’s a new sheriff in town. LOLWUT
I feel like I've been away from this for like,...
TELL ME ALL OF THE THINGS. What’s new? Who ya datin? Where you at? Wassup? What’d ya have for dinner? What’s new?
It could have been all of the beer.
Currently: Holding a funeral for my Twenties.
You were the best. I will miss you. Rest in peace.
I made a bunch of fudge and then ate some after it...
HOLIDAYZ FOR DAYZ
sequinsandsideeye: str8nochaser: YASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS Bayybaaaaaay!!!!!!! One of my top 5 favorite Cosby show moments ever. THE. BEST.
How's your 100% humidity for tomorrow???
My hair is already weeping…..