on this here tumblr place. I hate her with a passion usually reserved for people like…Ashton Kutcher. I want her head to explode and a million tiny bubbles to come out of the hole. Will all you gracious and kind people join with me in wishing for this thing? The head explosion and the bubbles? Excellent. Thank you.
No it’s not Julia Allison. I kind of like her blog. SHhhhhhhhhhhh. Don’t tell on me.
I don’t like driving off the ISLAND that I live on in this weather. I keep expecting Godzilla or the Cloverfield monster or Jaws or some crazy shit to pop up out of the water on the bridge connecting the island to mainland Tampa and I crash into the water or some crazy thing.
I usually don’t leave the island after dark either.
Do you get the glorious flooding we get on the other side of the bridge because that sure is a barrel of laughs?
If you could see the size of the damn pimple hanging from my chin right now you would think I’m some sort of space alien with an extra limb growing from her chin, that will fly out whenever taunted. Holding a gun. It legit looks like I have a hidden arm compartment that is armed with a loaded gun on my chin. Terminator style. But in reality I’m going through yet another pubescent phase as I also am quite moody, hate my parents, want to listen to Weezer all day in my bed and write in my journal about my crush on Nick Carter. Oh, and getting pimples, because that happened too.
“I make mistakes. That’s what I do. I
speak without thinking, I act without
knowing. I drink so much that I can
barely walk…I’m a fantastic lover
though, and an amazing friend. God
knows I mean well.”—Sex & The City
Today I noticed a man in a BMW clearly showing off his Beem’s technology by repeatedly making is convertable retract, and so on and so forth. So watching this thing go up and down, I got nervous, thinking his car was trying to eat him, so I inch next to him and say “Everything ok, Sir?” And he just laughs and says yes, and as I’m driving off I think to myself, self, if they can make automatic convertable tops…
THEN HOW CLOSE ARE THEY TO MAKING TRANSFORMERS?
Currently: Making plans for an exit strategy/bomb shelter should a robotic nuclear war break out.
It sounds as if something sinister is running through my walls, and so help me God if it’s mice and they don’t make me a wedding dress out of old curtains and a carraige out of a pumpkin we are going to have some serious issues.
Has there every been an episode of “Cheaters” where they follow the cheating party in question around for weeks, diagnosing every trip to Fridays (“Fridays? She at Friday’s with him? Yo that’s OUR spot”, tear, drool, tear, fight everyone in sight), and then they get to the big reveal and she’s all “Yo, Bookie, this ain’t no trick, this my estranged Daddy, Ron Rico!”, and everyone claps and cheers and cries, and then you’re all like wow, my faith in humanity has really been restored. THANKS CHEATERS!
Phrase I don't understand: "The more I see the less I know"
What kind of fucking idiot are you if you’re out seeing a bunch of stuff, and getting dumber? Where the fuck are you when this happening? I just want to know so I NEVER go there, there’s nothing worse than trying to vacation and coming back with 38% less brain mass.